P1: The Departure

This post backdates about a week, and so any events described here would have since then disappeared into the echelons of time, and remain only as memories etched into the mind of one, solitary, reminiscient person.

I shall exclude my departure from KLIA as I would prefer it to remain personal. Instead, I will tell you a little about my SIX BLOODY HOURS of transit in Dubai airport. "Why Dubai?" you may ask. Well, it's simply because our choice of airline to take us to London was Emirates, which places all it's passengers in Dubai for the oddest number of hours they can think of. In fact, I spent so many vacant hours stuck at the airport's transit area, Dubai Duty Free, that I actually learnt how to read Arabic. For example, the writing in the picture below says: "Pepsi".I bet you didn't know that.

But seriously, it's an open secret that Dubai is a filthy rich country; and that is probably what allows its people to be so unbelievably kitchy in their decor. I mean come on, there are UFO's and artificial palm trees within their airport!In fact, the people there are so excessively wealthy that it does not suffice for them to have dozens of artificial palm trees indoors, but they have to take it the extra mile by ensuring that all these palm trees are entirely made up of gold bars! Don't believe me? Witness this then:

If only they would have consulted me prior to incorporating such bizzare features into the frontlines of their country, I would have better advised them to invest the money instead on real, living greens in order to add a little more colour to the actual landscape. However, as they did not do so, this is the image that greets all travellers when flying over this famous, oil-rich country.

Now compare that to an aerial shot of London!

It's a tad cloudy, so the picture isn't too clear. The contrast between the 2, however, is crystal.

Oh, and speaking of London, that post's coming up in due time, so bear with me!

A Blogger's Holiday

Well, the time has come for me to bid a temporary farewell to all of you. Tonight, at 5 minutes past midnight on the 21st of July, I will be departing for Europe and will be away for a duration of 4 to 8 weeks.

As my access to the internet will be somewhat limited there, I cannot guarantee that there will be any updates on this page until I return. I will, however, try my best to keep you informed and up to date on my activities there- so do drop in once in a while.

As a prologue-of-sorts to my vacation posts, here are some of the places I'll be visiting:

London, England:Helsinki, Finland:Zurich, Switzerland:Tirol, Italy:
So wish me a good flight, and I'll see the lot of you when I get back.

Until then, cheers.

Wetlands Park

As my esteemed colleague Mr Loh has already informed most of you, last Tuesday, the 10th of July, 12 of us took a drive down south to Taman Wetlands in Putrajaya to get away from our hectic and busy.. eh wait. I'm on holiday. Forget that. So anyway, we took a drive down south to chill some chill and indulge in some kayaking.

First off, allow me to introduce you to Taman Wetlands:

There are many things one can do in Taman Wetlands. For example, one could emo..
One could also crossdress and pose.. However, the more normal visitors can opt for bread-spread royalty and go kayaking.An added bonus is that Badawi will be personally watching you from his bedroom window!

Contrary to popular belief, kayaking is not all about paddling a boat from point A to point B to point XYZ. No, its real purpose is to diversify those Nikon Moments* you have grown to love. On a kayak, you can simply take it easy and relax..
Or you can choose to have a splashing good time..Optionally, you can sit around and worry about losing your spectacles in the water.. And if you're just plain weird, then you may find that the kayak is the ideal place for you to party like a rockstar.! But first you have to learn how to use your oar the right way..Once you've mastered that, you can combine 2 kayaks and call yourselves..

THE OARSOME FOURSOME!!

By now I'm sure you'll have realised that kayaking is extremely enjoyable.. but be warned! Spending too much time under the sun can lead to heatstroke, and you looking like this.

Therefore, the best course of action to follow thereafter is to find a shady and serene spot suitable for a picnic.

The kind of food you bring does not matter. Whether you're consuming a weird nacho sandwich or a keeyuntjin, just make sure it's something you enjoy.

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If you're worried about the calories, try working it off through some gravity defying stunts!

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And if that tires you out, you can just laze around with your loved one, enjoying the cool breeze and laughing at the antics of those lamers you call friends.

Such was our day.

for more pictures: tap.

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*all images captured on kayaks are from KhooWeiJinn's Panasonic Lumix

The Best Of Casual Dining

Friday the 13th is commonly related to events of misfortune, and it is in that spirit that I shall now proceed to recount my Friday the 13th celebratory dinner which, of course, bears no relations whatsoever to any events of misfortune, and celebrates nothing in particular.

Having heard so much about the place but never yet having the fortune of patronising its establishments, my baby and I decided to trade our money in exchange for edibles at the infamous
Tony Roma's is essentially a slightly more upmarket version of Chillis or T.G.I.F., serving American "cuisine" in American portions. Although the food may be a little more pricey in the amount of a few Ringgit, the decor and cosy ambience is definitely worth it. Besides, all customers receive complimentary fresh baked bread before their meal, which the more calculative can deduct from their bills. We deliberated on a starter and decided to stick to convention by opting for the much recommended and highly acclaimed TR Onion Loaf, which is basically giant hand-cut Spanish onions, breaded, deep fried and served with TR house BBQ dipping sauce. Giant being the operative term..This monster was larger than my 2 fists put together, and though it's the recommended portion for 2, after downing half a loaf the taste gets rather cloying and sort of puts you off eating the rest.

Besides, unless your name is Teh Hann Tsong, I'd recommend you not order a starter at all, because your main course is going to be monstrously large as well, and a starter will in all likelihood fill you up and thus prevent you from fully enjoying (read: finishing) your actual meal.

If you do decide to order the TR Onion Loaf however, be sure not to order the Steak Sandwich as your main course, which is what Sarah did. Nothing against the sandwich (it's delicious)- but half it's contents are made up of.? Yep. Giant hand-cut Spanish onions, deep fried and breaded. Sound familiar? Of course it does.. it's that cloying taste still lingering in your mouth. Now, if you still think it doesn't look big, feel free to compare it to the cup and saltshaker in the background- the cup is one and a half times as large as those in Chillis or Fridays. It's a gigantic collage of amazing flavours and textures that just slithers down your throat while your taste buds dance in joy and sing Hallelujah, scarcely believing that such flavours could really exist.

Not skipping a beat, my order of the TR Cheesy Burger matched up to the sandwich easily in terms of taste, and outclassed it effortlessly in terms of size. The beef patty was larger in diameter than the plate in the background, and thicker than an average sized wallet. Even the tomatoes were enormous and juicy. It was pretty much heaven on a plate, but in portions large enough to stuff even the generally large eater.
Being used to whalloping all my burgers in a few bites, with my hands as the only medium between the plate and my mouth, it was an entirely new experience for me as I had to slowly cut my burger into little pieces in order to eat it- it just wouldn't fit into my mouth as a whole.
Oh, and if they offer to exchange your side order of fries for anything else, my advice is don't. The mashed potatoes may be good, but the fries are awesome.

And so, after a delicious, heartening, and partially wasted meal, we can finally say that we have sampled the fare at Tony Roma's, and would gladly return one day....with much larger appetites of course.

Malacca

Radio blaring the end of an advertisement in the background: ".. so guys! Take your chicks to all the cool places around Malaysia, because Malaysia is.... Chuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnn! "

Having been, in all probability, brainwashed by said advertisement, Sarah and I decided to take a drive down to Malacca for a day, just because.

Malacca's pretty much the same, still hot, still cheap, but with less green and more mall - anyone remember the old Bullock Cart ride on the padang? Well it's gone. In it's place? Dataran Pahlawan Digital and IT Mall. Woohoo for the preservation of our culture and history!

So hennyway, the reason most people locals pop into Malacca is for the food. In that spirit, we decided to be as touristy as possible in our day and scout out the best of its popular food.

Lunch was Malacca's infamous Chicken Rice Balls of course - really good, with the only minor complaint being that the chicken was cut very irregularly, though that didn't affect the taste whatsoever. I kind of missed the name of the place, but it's a corner shoplot immediately on your right upon crossing the bridge, opposite OCBC Bank. You can't possibly miss it.

Of course, supposing you're still thirsty after your meal, Malacca's even got places where you can get drinks for free! With a few conditions of course..

Who says sexism no longer exists?

In Malacca, there are two ways to burn off the calories from lunch- letting the sun melt it away and the classic "walking". The most efficient way is to combine the two, which is what we then did, combined with some Nikon Moments of course.









A not-to-be-missed place for those Nikon Moments is definitely the Church of St. Paul, with its windy path up, gorgeous green grass, ancient architecture and historical history, it's what your camera's been dreaming about since it was nothing more than a little lump of metal in the ground. It also provides sweet relief from the heat with a cool breeze constantly blowing into the shade.

After some time wandering around, you'll start to notice that the heat is getting quite hot. When such a time does come, and it will, there are a selection of things one can do to cool down. You can opt to..

cool off by a fountain..

or have an ice cream. (you can even use the stick for weird camwhoring!)

Now one thing I realised about Malacca is that many of it's buildings and shops are extremely creatively designed. You have..

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The Orang Utan House, which is basically a shop selling artwork and t-shirts featuring the designs of one Charles Cham. You have to admit, it's intriguing isn't it? Almost reason enough on it's own to persuade you to patronise the shop.

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The doors of a tattoo parlour.

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And of course there's Capitol Satay Restaurant, where we procured our evening meal-

My first taste of satay celup.

Now, no touristy trip down to Malacca would be complete without being chauffered around town in a trishaw by a 22 year old electrical engineering student called Carl, and so in order to complete our trip, that's what we did.

Not long after, we took our leave of Malaysia's most historic state, keeping in mind the wisdom we had discovered that day.. wisom which I shall now pass unto you.

So bear in mind, always, that when you are in Malacca, you absolutely must